


Shoplifting

by FalonomAfterMidnight



Series: Human AU Steven Universe [1]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Chocolate, Cravings, Don't Try This At Home, Flashbacks, Gen, Humor, Irony, Moral Lessons, Post-Irony, Shoplifting, Shout-outs, Teen Years, Teenage Rebellion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-30
Updated: 2018-04-30
Packaged: 2019-04-30 04:43:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14489073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FalonomAfterMidnight/pseuds/FalonomAfterMidnight
Summary: Pink Diamond gets busted when she tries to steal a bunch of candy bars.





	Shoplifting

**Author's Note:**

> So, I finally got the inspiration to write a Human AU Steven Universe story. 
> 
> To be honest, I was laying in bed one night, when suddenly, this idea appeared in my head and wouldn't leave!

One fine Spring afternoon, while her parents were at work, a 13-year-old Pink Diamond was starting to get hungry. But those crummy leftovers in the fridge wouldn't suit her one bit (Pink was often forced to cook and warm up food herself, as her moms usually came home late because they were both businesswomen). She would rather go buy and eat something fresh.

 _Aww, but I don't have any money..._ And Pink was often discouraged from asking for money all the time, being a little bit of a spendthrift.

As it also turns out, she was in the mood for something sweet. Chocolate, perhaps...?

Then she got an idea. An awful idea. Pink Diamond had a wonderful, awful idea.

As soon as she left the house and locked the front door, she took off! Pink strolled down the street to the 24/7 convenience store that was a few blocks away; she arrived there and began to look around. Suddenly, she felt adrenaline pumping throughout her veins.

Pink quickly found the candy isle, went over there and grabbed a candy bar for herself, and stuffed it down her pants. And then she grabbed another candy bar and stuffed it down her pants as well. And then another. And then another. Eventually, her pants were on the verge of falling down from the sheer weight of the snacks.

 _Hahahahaha! So long, suckers!_ Pink held her pants up with both hands as she made a mad dash for the exit. _Phew! Home fr--_

"Just what do you think you're doing, young lady?!" yelled the owner, as he ran after her and yanked her back into the store by the collar. Amidst the shock of suddenly being grabbed and pulled away, everything that Pink stole fell out of her pants.

"Uhh, what? What's the problem?" Pink tried to act casual.

"The problem is, I saw you steal those chocolate bars and try to run out of here." said the middle-aged owner, pointing to the messy floor with his free hand. The owner then took Pink by the hand and to his office. "You know, if you were 18, you would automatically be sent to jail. But since you're only a kid, I'm afraid I'm going to have to call your mother." he said.

"Noo, please don’t call her!" pleaded Pink as she was dragged inside to the owner's office and sat on a chair at a table. She was terrified of Yellow's wrath; how would the latter even _react_ to the news that her daughter was shoplifting?

The man was NOT willing to repeat himself, but he was left with no choice. "I'm calling your mother. Give me her number. In the meantime, you sit in my office, and don’t even _think_ about leaving.” said the owner, which prompted Pink to reluctantly give him the number. Before he left the room with this phone, he gave the girl one more warning. "Because if you do, I'll call the police."

Pink sat in a chair, sulking and pouting, while the man called Yellow Diamond. Pink couldn’t hear what was being said since the owner had left the office, but it looked like Yellow was heading over very soon.

"Ok, Mrs. Diamond. We’ll see you in a little bit.” said the owner as he hung up his phone.

 _'See you in a little bit'?! Oh no!_ Pink gulped.

"Pink, your mother will be here soon, so you just sit right and think about what you've done, you little thief.” instructed the owner. Pink remained seated and went back to pouting.

About 15 minutes later, Yellow came by and spoke to the owner. Both looked _really_ pissed, but after a good while had passed, Yellow finally headed towards the office where Pink was at.

"H-hey, Yellow." said Pink nervously as the matriarch slammed the door open and came in.

"Stealing!? Just what were you thinking, Pink!?" shouted Yellow as she angrily pulled her daughter out of the room.

"I-I'm sorry, mom..." Pink stammered, her voice cracking. She looked like she was about to cry.

"Well, at least I think she's learned her lesson." The owner tried to give a comforting smile, in an attempt to reduce the heavy tension in the air.

"Again, I'm really sorry about what happened." Yellow said. "As soon as Pink and I get home, we're going to have a _very_ long talk about this. It won't. Happen. Again." she assured, as she dragged the child out of the store by the wrist.

The owner sighed and tried to get back to work as soon as they were gone. Little did he know that history had actually repeated itself...

* * *

Many years ago, one early Spring morning, a 15-year-old Yellow Diamond snuck out of the house while White Diamond was still asleep. The teenager was having some serious cravings for chocolate, but her mother was always restricting her consumption habits.

As soon as she arrived at the 24/7 convenience store that was (still) just a few blocks down from where she lived, Yellow walked over to the candy aisle, and shoved as many candy bars as she could down her shirt; this also gave her the false impression that she naturally had big boobs.

 _Yes. YES!_ Yellow could already taste the sweet chocolate as she tried to run out of the store as fast as she could while supporting her bulging chest. She was nearly at the exit, when suddenly--

"Hold it right there, miss!" shouted the previous owner, as he ran over and pulled her back inside by the arm.

"What?!" Yellow snapped, unable to catch all of the candy bars that fell right out of her shirt and onto the store floor.

"Don't you give me that! I saw you try to swipe those bars and run!" The previous owner gestured to the candy bar-covered floor with his free arm. "Y'know, I could just throw your little butt into jail since you look old enough, but I'd rather let you off with a warning this time." lectured the man as he grabbed Yellow’s hand and led her towards his office. “I’ll have to give your mother a call.”

"Fine, go ahead! Call her! I don't care!" spat Yellow angrily as she was dragged inside the office and sat on the chair.

"Miss, I'm out of patience. Now sit right here, and don't get any more bright ideas, you little thief.” said the previous owner. Before he left, he gave the blonde one final warning. "And I swear, if you leave my office, I'll call the cops. Got it? Great." He went to the phone on the wall outside the office. Yellow avoided any sort of eye contact with him, even as she begrudgingly gave the man her home phone number.

Yellow sat there with her back turned and pouted at the wall. She did her best to listen to the conversation that the owner and her mother were having, but she couldn’t hear them on the other side. That said, based off of the tone, she could tell that it wasn’t a pleasant call.

About 20 minutes later, White arrived at the store and was greeted by the owner; they chatted for a little bit. After their conversation ended, White went and grabbed the troublemaker out of the office.

"Stealing?! What do you have to say for yourself, Yellow?!” started White. "Apologize at once!"

Yellow kept her head down and mumbled a "sorry", but it didn't really sound genuine.

"This is the only chance I'm giving her. The next time she tries to shoplift, she'll be behind bars." The previous owner nodded.

"We're very sorry about all of this, Sir." White said. "Yellow and I are going to have a _very_ long conversation when we get home. This will never happen again." she assured, as she dragged her daughter out of the store by the ear.

 _...Kids these days..._ The previous owner shook his head and went back to his duties once they were gone.

**Author's Note:**

> Oh, Pink... if only you knew that your own mother was a brat just like you...
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
